(Source: double-takee)
MOM, WATCHING THE VOICE
- Mom: This girl is a bitch!
- Mom: I hate seeing American Idol commercials. That show is the worst.
- Mom: I would rather listen to Cee-Lo than Nicki Minaj.
- Me: You've said that every week this season.
- Mom: Have I? Well, I mean it.
- Mom: I can't understand what they're singing about when they sing in Spanish.
- Mom: BLAKE IS SO FUNNY.
- Mom: Wow. I can't believe he stole her. That is pretty stupid.
- Mom: Can you please put your feet down? You're sitting like Usher. It's obnoxious.
Hi there.
So, I don’t know about you, but I’ve spent the last three months really angry about what happened in Newtown. I’m mad that those sweet, beautiful, innocent little kids weren’t kept safe. I’m mad that their poor parents are now forced to face a life without them. I’m mad that the brave teachers and educators at the school that day were taken away from their friends, from their siblings, from spouses, from their kids. I’m mad about Oak Creek. I’m mad about Aurora. I’m mad about Tucson. I’m mad about the fact that innocent people die every day in the “land of the free” because guns abound.
Mainly, though, I think what makes me the most angry is the inaction of legislators. These people don’t represent their constituents. They work for lobbyists, for corporations that fund their campaigns in return for votes and tax loopholes and exemptions and so much other bullshit it makes my head spin.
Here is a list of the Senators that voted against the bill, along with the amount of money they received in their last election cycle from the NRA. I didn’t include their party because, honestly, parties don’t matter. Republicans and Democrats aren’t on different teams. Their loyalty begins and ends with the people that write their checks. These numbers are from the Center for Responsive Politics, which is kick-ass site that we should all be reading daily.
Lamar Alexander (GA) - $13,350
John Barrasso (WY) - $9,899
Max Baucus (MT) - $7,450
Roy Blunt (MO) - $9,900
John Boozman (AR) $2,000
Richard Burr (NC) - $7,900
Saxby Chambliss (TN) - $9,900
Tom Coburn (OK) - $2,000
Thad Cochran (MS) - $5,000
Bob Corker (TN) - $4,950
John Cornyn (TX) - $500
Mike Crapo (ID) - $5,950
Ted Cruz (TX) - $10,150
Mike Enzi (WY) - $5,950
Deb Fischer (NE) - $4,950
Lindsey Graham (SC) - $7,400
Chuck Grassley (IA) - $6,950
Orrin Hatch (UT) - $5,000
Dean Heller (NV) - $9,900
John Hoeven (ND) - $4,950
James Inhofe (OK) - $8,400
Johnny Isakson (GA) - $2,500
Mike Johanns (NE) - $4,950
Ron Johnson (WI) - $1,000
Mike Lee (UT) - $2,500
Mitch McConnell (KY) - $9,900
Jerry Moran (KS) - $3,000
Lisa Murkowski (AK) - $4,500
Rob Portman (OH) - $9,900
James Risch (ID) - $4,950
Pat Roberts (KS) - $5,950
Marco Rubio (FL) - $4,950
Jeff Sessions (AL) - $4,950
Richard Shelby (AL) - $8,450
John Thune (SD) - $8,000
David Vitter (LA) - $4,950
Roger Wicker (MS) - $7,450
Vote these motherfuckers out.
So sweet. So naïve.
“My biggest adrenaline rush of the day was watching tribal council.” — things I said in both 2001 and 2013
See you in 317 pages.
FAVOURITE HEADLINE ALWAYS AND FOREVER
(Source: pleatedjeans)
LOL STEP ASIDE, PEASANTS.
WATCHING THE VOICE
- Mom: This show is so much better without Cee-Lo.
- Me: He's coming back next year.
- Mom: OH MY GOD, WHY? That's such a bad choice.
- Me: Look, I found an article about it. It says he's taking a break this season because he's working on music and developing a sitcom based on his life.
- Mom: ARE YOU KIDDING?
- Mom: No, seriously. Who is going to watch that show? Not me.
- Mom: The only people that are going to watch his show are him and his stupid shoulder bird.
- Mom: Seriously.
- Mom: Well, he's still better than Nicki Minaj.
